nonsensical stuffs

i want to dance. i want to sing. i want to strip into a bikini and feel the hot puerto sand under my skin. i want heat and i want to go so bad. ofcourse it is possible, i've got a very small problem though. my parents won't let me. who would blame them? boys, beach and beer, now that's a bad combination, a formula for an unwanted future. hahaha. but i'm a good girl, really, i just want to go for the sun and, well, the sand. that's not too bad. a little fun won't do a good girl bad, right? and everybody's going. except me. i should've gotten used to this scenario, but no, i'm still hopeful that they won’t ask questions, just nod their heads and open their wallets. oh joy. wishful thinking.

enough of puerto talk. i gave up my tickets for the atROCKtion concert because i'm trying to save up some of my allowance. so goodbye parokya and all you other bands. ima stay home and do my report like a good student should.

oh but i'm not a good student. a few hours ago i was talking with kuya rey, and well he's still running (more like brisk walking he said) for laude. and i'm gliding my way to dismissal. hahaha!! anyway, why can't i work harder? i can do better than a 1.9 gwa. i could run for laude too, if i atleast pay more attention to my studies than to my sleeping. But I can never seem to have the motivation to study. oh but anyway way, kuya rey got this 'ur halimaw' look when i told him i got 1.75 in HUM1 under ma'am Layeta Bucoy. i try not to show it, but i guess that sorta pulls my self esteem up. because like Chui said, Bucoy's the shit. she's the goddess of literature. oh and how i cried as i finished her take home exam because i was so afraid of insulting her intelligence by coming up with a mediocre crap. but i passed, and i did so much more than pass, i got a 1.75 and apparently for Bucoy, i must be a little good enough. maybe i could be a palanca awardee too. haha!! pushing my luck a bit here. But really, it means a lot to find out that not many gets a high grade from bucoy. Someone from batch 05 got 1.25, now that’s amazing. She’s in a goddess training for all I know. I’m jealous. Argh.

read Nikko's eulogy. almost cried. he's a good writer, well, better than me. haha. i have a knack for flushing my self-esteem down the drain, but he really is better.

anyway. gotta go, got a meeting with my SOC130 classmates about our report tomorrow. and ima drag my feet to vega because i don't want to go. there's nothing else i'd rather do than to stay home and write. oh yeah, manuod ng atROCKtion. ah, why is everything so depressing. i don't get what i'm saying dammit. got to go.